Jan
12
Women only - my wife’s stress?
Filed Under Women in Music
She’s very stressed about things but one I feel that stresses her out is that besides my day job, I’m looking to find some extra work in my other profession (musician) where I can earn a few extra $$ for the family.
I know she feels guilty because she has encountered so much difficulty to find a job of her own (she is born deaf), also I fear she is worried that other women will try to come on to me.
I continually try to reassure her that I would never let any other woman in my heart - my wife is my beloved, my soul’s treasure - and I want only to make sure my beloved has enough money to remain happy and content.
How shall I calm her fears and her heart? I worry for her.
I do earn good money in my day job - I work as an electronic engineer - but the utilities + the kids needs are very expensive.
She struggles to find a job. She doesn’t qualify for disability benefits. And the stress is wearing her thin.
I tell her every day I love her and I want only her, but she has her fears, and no words seem to be able to calm her at times.
Just FYI: As a musician, I’ve seen the trashy side of women come out during shows……that’s just NOT MY style, never has been and never will be.
I’m in music because I have the skill, the talent and the love of music for it’s own sake.
Her education is just high school, grade 12 graduate. She desires to learn more but educational opportunities for the deaf are hard to find.
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Comments
5 Responses to “Women only - my wife’s stress?”
Wow, sounds like she is a lucky woman… I think you have the right idea, just keep letting her know that she is the only one for you. On the logical side trust is something that is earned, hopefully, eventualy she will see over time that you will not let another woman in.
She’s just going to have to find the courage to be confident. You need to tell her in a firm voice (initally) that you love her, and that she needs to learn to trust you, because you chose her, and that you will not stray in the relationship. It’s gonna have to be like a SNAP OUT OF IT kinda confrontation, so that she can either get on board and be supportive, or just continue to mope around and stress all day. As far as her working, does she have a degree? Can she get a job at a local hospital as an interpreter? Maybe a local special education school or non-profit organization? Mental Health or Mental Retardation facility? There are jobs out there that would appreciate her ability to communicate with non-hearing folks. Best of luck.
It’s not worth the extra $$ if in the end it makes your relationship with your wife worse. Focus on your priorities. If you really need the extra money, or if you want the extra work because music is your passion, go for it, but talk to your wife and explain why it is important to you. Does she have any reason for not trusting you?
Support her and give her options. She must realize that her disability should not slow her down or stop her. I work at a hospital and we have two nurses there that were born deaf. They have graduated from RN school, and one is moving on to get her Masters. They are wonderful nurses! Just support her and let her talk about it. We all know what it is to struggle with money, especially when you have kids! It is never easy! The final and most important thing you can do for her is pray, pray for her and with her
God works wonders!
I don’t think your wife is questioning the fact that she has your heart in this case. I think that she just might be a little bit more reserved about the fact that she’s probably not going to be spending as much time with you. For some women, how much or how little money we have is not a factor. You’re trying and that’s all that counts. Yes it’s great that you’re trying to bring in the extra income, but talk to her and see exactly what is going through that mind of hers. Good luck.